It was Jay E Adams in his book Competent to Counsel. (Zondervan. 1986. ISBN 0-310-51140-2) who first opened my mind to the biblical principle of nouthetic counselling. I was immediately excited by what I read there and it has been a guiding principle in my pastoral ministry ever since. I haven't got space here to expand sufficiently on this topic so I commend the book. Try your local Christian book shop first but if all fails it is available on Amazon, with a Kindle version also available.
Adams draws on a number of passages in the New Testament where the Greek word nouthesia (or a related word) appears. It is usually translated as to correct or admonish. As you will see from the various Bible references I will provide in a moment, this is something that all Christians should be able to do - but it does require a level of maturity. But that is something we should all aim to attain. Adams argues that the process involves confrontation or challenge, but that it is always offered in a positive, loving and helpful way.
Such a biblical approach is in stark contrast to the harsh, accusing, censorious and acerbic rebukes that are all too often used whenever one Christian sees another coming short of the standard of conduct he believes to be correct. What regularly distresses me is that we so easily become legalistic about so many things, abandoning the greatest commandments of all in the process. I have also noted that sincere evangelicals are sometimes among the most guilty, while they are often the most vocal against legalism! We all need to search our hearts. If we do not have love then we are clanging gongs, worthless and having and gaining nothing (1Corinthians 13: 1-3).
Jesus had something to say about this that involves trying to remove some small matter from the eye of a person while failing to see the much larger matter in our own eyes (Matthew 7: 3 - 5). Now, the eagle-eyed (pun intended) will have noted Matthew 7:1 which seems to state clearly that we should never judge another person. But if that is understood as a categorical forbidding to judge then it would contradict other passages of scripture as well as making nonsense. We cannot go through life without making judgements about what is right and rong, who can be trusted, and who cannot be trusted, etc. What the opening part of Matthew 7 is warning against is the exercise of a harsh and critical spirit.
So let's look at a few key verses that refer to this better (nouthetic) approach to correction. Please remember that the basis on which any confrontation and attempt at correction is made must always be based upon a loving concern for the welfare of the other person and must include support and help.
In Romans 15:14 we read, "I myself am convinced, my brothers and sisters, that you yourselves are full of goodness, filled with knowledge and competent to instruct (noutheteo) one another." The word tranjslated here in the NIV as instruct is not the Greek word for teach. This is corrective instruction. Here is an indication that all Christians should be able to offer such help, but we note that the qualifications for competence are a sufficiency of goodness and knowledge.
Sometimes the Greek word is translated "warn" such as in Acts 20:31 where Paul refers to his ministry at Ephesus over three years - but note that he did so with much compassion as he refers to his tears. We also find it translated as "warn" in 1 Corinthians 4:14 where it is used in a loving sense.
Colossians 3:16 sets the process of admonition in the context of worship: "Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts."
In 2 Thessalonians 3 Paul writes about professing Christians who are determinedly idle, disruptive and living lives contrary to what was expected of Christians. Paul tells the others to dissociate themselves but always to treat them as brothers or sisters and not as if they were the enemy.
Spiritual maturity is seen not only in the ability to admonish others properly but also to be admonished by others. As Paul writes in 1Thessalonians 5:12 "Now we ask you, brothers and sisters, to acknowledge those who work hard among you, who care for you in the Lord and who admonish you."
It is all too easy to become overbearing and judgemental concerning the faults we see in others but we are likely to more effective when we can see our own weaknesses. For two years during my training I supported myself by working in a small Valuation Office in Hastings. At tea breaks all the staff (except the tree top bosses) gathered together. Criticism was not unusual, but a dear older man would say softly, "The faults we see in others are most often to be found in ourselves".
If we are to move on in our faith, grow closer to God, and have churches that reflect Christ's glory, then we will need to learn to admonish one another from a basis of healthy self-criticism, with a spirit of love and generosity that is always caring, supportive and helpful. We can do better in this area, and we might need to start by apologising when we have failed.
From the diary
Thank you for praying for my activities over the past week. We had an excellent time at the prison on Tuesday which was followed in the evening with a productive meeting as a group of villages plan activities under the Hope Together banner.
On Wednesday and Thursday I was engaged in various meetings in East Sussex. Some of these are of a confidential nature and I value your continued prayer that I might be wise in dealing with these.
On Saturday I was in Leeds meeting with about a dozen Salvation Army Officers and a key person from the Roman Catholic Church exploring safeguarding matters. I was very encouraged by the warm comments at the end of the day. It was a fruitful but tiring week.
This week I will be spending most of my time working on our charity accounts and preparing for our trustees meeting. I will be in HMP Gartree as usual on Tuesday afternoon. There is a staff management meeting on Wednesday evening and a Bible Discussion meeting on Thursday morning. On Saturday Doreen and I will be supporting an Induction Service for a new minister at a church near Leicester. On Sunday we will be back at Yelvertoft.
Thank you for all your continuing prayers.
Barry
Adams draws on a number of passages in the New Testament where the Greek word nouthesia (or a related word) appears. It is usually translated as to correct or admonish. As you will see from the various Bible references I will provide in a moment, this is something that all Christians should be able to do - but it does require a level of maturity. But that is something we should all aim to attain. Adams argues that the process involves confrontation or challenge, but that it is always offered in a positive, loving and helpful way.
Such a biblical approach is in stark contrast to the harsh, accusing, censorious and acerbic rebukes that are all too often used whenever one Christian sees another coming short of the standard of conduct he believes to be correct. What regularly distresses me is that we so easily become legalistic about so many things, abandoning the greatest commandments of all in the process. I have also noted that sincere evangelicals are sometimes among the most guilty, while they are often the most vocal against legalism! We all need to search our hearts. If we do not have love then we are clanging gongs, worthless and having and gaining nothing (1Corinthians 13: 1-3).
Jesus had something to say about this that involves trying to remove some small matter from the eye of a person while failing to see the much larger matter in our own eyes (Matthew 7: 3 - 5). Now, the eagle-eyed (pun intended) will have noted Matthew 7:1 which seems to state clearly that we should never judge another person. But if that is understood as a categorical forbidding to judge then it would contradict other passages of scripture as well as making nonsense. We cannot go through life without making judgements about what is right and rong, who can be trusted, and who cannot be trusted, etc. What the opening part of Matthew 7 is warning against is the exercise of a harsh and critical spirit.
So let's look at a few key verses that refer to this better (nouthetic) approach to correction. Please remember that the basis on which any confrontation and attempt at correction is made must always be based upon a loving concern for the welfare of the other person and must include support and help.
In Romans 15:14 we read, "I myself am convinced, my brothers and sisters, that you yourselves are full of goodness, filled with knowledge and competent to instruct (noutheteo) one another." The word tranjslated here in the NIV as instruct is not the Greek word for teach. This is corrective instruction. Here is an indication that all Christians should be able to offer such help, but we note that the qualifications for competence are a sufficiency of goodness and knowledge.
Sometimes the Greek word is translated "warn" such as in Acts 20:31 where Paul refers to his ministry at Ephesus over three years - but note that he did so with much compassion as he refers to his tears. We also find it translated as "warn" in 1 Corinthians 4:14 where it is used in a loving sense.
Colossians 3:16 sets the process of admonition in the context of worship: "Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts."
In 2 Thessalonians 3 Paul writes about professing Christians who are determinedly idle, disruptive and living lives contrary to what was expected of Christians. Paul tells the others to dissociate themselves but always to treat them as brothers or sisters and not as if they were the enemy.
Spiritual maturity is seen not only in the ability to admonish others properly but also to be admonished by others. As Paul writes in 1Thessalonians 5:12 "Now we ask you, brothers and sisters, to acknowledge those who work hard among you, who care for you in the Lord and who admonish you."
It is all too easy to become overbearing and judgemental concerning the faults we see in others but we are likely to more effective when we can see our own weaknesses. For two years during my training I supported myself by working in a small Valuation Office in Hastings. At tea breaks all the staff (except the tree top bosses) gathered together. Criticism was not unusual, but a dear older man would say softly, "The faults we see in others are most often to be found in ourselves".
If we are to move on in our faith, grow closer to God, and have churches that reflect Christ's glory, then we will need to learn to admonish one another from a basis of healthy self-criticism, with a spirit of love and generosity that is always caring, supportive and helpful. We can do better in this area, and we might need to start by apologising when we have failed.
From the diary
Thank you for praying for my activities over the past week. We had an excellent time at the prison on Tuesday which was followed in the evening with a productive meeting as a group of villages plan activities under the Hope Together banner.
On Wednesday and Thursday I was engaged in various meetings in East Sussex. Some of these are of a confidential nature and I value your continued prayer that I might be wise in dealing with these.
On Saturday I was in Leeds meeting with about a dozen Salvation Army Officers and a key person from the Roman Catholic Church exploring safeguarding matters. I was very encouraged by the warm comments at the end of the day. It was a fruitful but tiring week.
This week I will be spending most of my time working on our charity accounts and preparing for our trustees meeting. I will be in HMP Gartree as usual on Tuesday afternoon. There is a staff management meeting on Wednesday evening and a Bible Discussion meeting on Thursday morning. On Saturday Doreen and I will be supporting an Induction Service for a new minister at a church near Leicester. On Sunday we will be back at Yelvertoft.
Thank you for all your continuing prayers.
Barry
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