Tuesday, 1 August 2017

Life Sometimes Hurts

We were singing John Wimber’s short hymn, “O let the Son of God enfold you with is Spirit and his love” and were partly through the second verse which has the lines, “O give him all your tears and sadness, give him all your years of pain”, when I suddenly felt there was someone with a special need in the meeting.  It was a Sunday evening and I was leading a meeting in a church hall.  There were no more than 24, and possibly less, in attendance and all of them I knew quite well. What I felt was that there was someone there who was deeply hurt, so much so that their soul felt as if it was one large bruise, too tender to touch.

I couldn’t think who it might be. It didn’t seem to fit anyone, as far as I was aware.  Was it my imagination, or could it have been a revelation from God.  If it was, then that sort of thing was not a common experience for me.  As we stopped singing, I plucked up courage, and spoke.  “I’m not sure if God has revealed something to me, but I think there might be someone here tonight who has suffered a deep hurt, like a very painful bruise.  Now you feel so bruised that you dare not even allow God to touch you in case it brings more pain.  If you recognise what I am saying, please know that the Holy Spirit moves very gently.  Let him touch you and heal the pain as we sing the song once again.”  We sang the song again and the service moved on.

I half hoped someone would speak to me after the meeting, and put me at ease.  But no one did and I went home feeling a little stupid.  The next morning, I found an envelope had been pushed through our letterbox.  On opening it I found a beautiful poem, written as a testimony by Anna.  I had called her family the previous day.  They were relaxing and Anna was sitting on a settee with her feet up.  But there was nothing to alert me to what she had just gone through.  I was to learn that she had just come home from hospital following an operation to terminate an ectopic pregnancy.  A little life had been developing in one of her fallopian tubes instead of the womb.  A surgical procedure had been urgently required, bringing an end to the pain, but also to the life within her.  But one pain had been replaced with another pain, for which there was no easy cure.

While I was ignorant of all Anna had gone through, and the hurt she felt that Sunday evening, God knew, and longed to touch her soul, if only she would let him.  Here is Anna’s poem, written on arriving home that evening.

Empty arms are painful,
Empty arms they hurt,
Empty arms – they tear
At the strings of my heart

I long to hold my baby
I long to call his name
I long to whisper, “I love you”
And caress that delicate frame.

His creation was so special
He was to be our third
The love that was his making –
Beauty – unseen – unheard.

A longed for little brother
A longed for little son
Excitement becomes a nightmare
As death threatens the little one.

Foetus – the medics called him
Pregnancy products his name
Ectopic was my condition
Surgery the cure for the pain.

I got caught up in all their mechanics
The stitches, the scar and the pills.
But the hurt – it just continued
Grief the cause of my ills.

My babe got lost in the jargon –
The jargon of hospital care.
He wasn’t a baby, he wasn’t a child,
Just an “it” no longer there.

Reality was dulled by this tactic;
It even worked for a while.
“Try for another to replace it”
Well-meaning advice with a smile.

It wasn’t another baby I needed
As a remedy – feelings to numb;
I had to work through the turmoil
The sadness of losing my son.

I was angry with God for a short time
“I don’t understand” was my cry.
“I want my baby – I WANT MY BABY”.
“I love you” came His reply.

God was longing to heal me.
This I knew deep down from the start
But I was scared to let him touch me
Scared of more pain in my heart.

He said, “Remember, I lost my baby –
Gave up my precious Son,
Watched him suffer and die in the worst way
For you, my beloved one.

I cry with you as you’re weeping;
I feel with you as you hurt;
Let me love you, walk with you, care for you,
Embrace you and bring you comfort.”

The Holy Spirit works gently
I heard somebody say
Like warm ointment He flowed in to heal me,
And soothed all the pain away.

Anna Wilson 
(Included here with permission.  Please do not reproduce in any form without permission)

Over the years since that day, I have shared Anna’s beautiful poem on occasions.  Often it has been used alongside one of my favourite solos, “All I ever do is love you” by Marilyn Baker.  I have always felt a special anointing when singing that song, and God has used it so many times to touch hearts.  I   had planned at the start of last week to incorporate John Winber’s hymn and Anna’s poem into the service at Gartree Prison yesterday.  When that decision was made I was not to know that little Charlie Gard would be allowed to die at the end of the week.  Nor was I aware until after the service, that several of the prisoners had wept over the loss of their own baby.  After the service, some prisoners testified to weeping as sang John Wimber’s song.  Another prisoner told me how his mother had experienced a traumatic ectopic pregnancy, and that he had been conceived not long after that.  Sadly, faith in Christ had been replaced by anger towards God for his mother.  Two prisoners have asked for copies of the poem to send back to their families.

Whatever your opinion regarding the battle fought by Charlie’s parents, as they resisted the advice of the specialist at the hospital, I know his passing will have caused them deep sadness.  Emotions might include anger at this time.  But I know too that God loves them and that he is what they need.  Occasionally, pastoral issues have challenged me enormously.  One such occasion was on the second successive cot death for two friends of mine.  Another occasion was hearing a colleague, who was a hospital chaplain, speak about the frightening number of services he conducted in a year following still births or other infant mortality situations.  I’m not sure that I could have done his job.  Sharing the pain of parents on the loss of a child is far from easy.

Jesus wept at the graveside of a friend.  I feel sure that the heart of God the Father was torn as he watched his Son endure the cross.  Whatever painful experience we might pass through in our lives, God knows what we might seek to hide from others, or even deny to ourselves.  He knows, he loves, and he cares.  If you are not familiar with the hymn it is 502 in Mission Praise, if you use that book.  I would also be happy to send the words if anyone has difficulty in tracking it down.

From the Diary
Saturday 5th August – The Webinar (see below).  Please make sure that you have booked in.
Sunday 6th – Weldon Congregational Church, Rutland
9th to 11th – I will be working in East Sussex on a difficult project.
Sunday 13th – Newark Congregational Church, Nottinghamshire
14 – 18 “Holiday at Home” outreach to older people in Market Harborough.
Saturday 19th – East Midlands Mission Support Group Meeting
Sunday 20th – Welby Lane Mission, Melton Mowbray.

The trustees of Rural Mission Solutions determined to close a bank account and have opened an account elsewhere.  Unfortunately, this has not gone smoothly, and we operate with a limited income for that ministry.  Please pray that existing supporters will not be lost through this process.

Please pray for Christian friends at Dunks Green, near Tonbridge.  I am a trustee of the Chapel there, and we are seeking permission from the Charity Commission to transfer it to a new charity that the members have set up.  Please pray that this will not be hindered any more than it has been already.

I am a trustee under a Will which includes a large and run-down property in East Sussex.  My fellow trustee and I would like to re-accommodate the elderly lady who lives in this house and provide her with a regular income. But she is very attached and has resisted this. She now needs a fairly high level of care.  While we do not wish to cause her stress, we feel that we have no alternative to our plan.  Please pray.

Please pray for a church in Hastings, where I was surprised to find I was still a trustee some 29 years after leaving this church!  I have been trying to point this church in the best direction for resolving governance issues they have.

Finally, lease pray for new additional appropriate people to come and share in our ministry to the rural churches of the UK.  A ‘Joshua’ is needed, not to mention a Timothy and John Mark!

Thank you for standing with us.


Barry

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