Why Forgive

I started writing these reflections following the brutal murders in Charleston, South Carolina a few weeks ago.  Since then there have been other acts of sectarian violence and murder.  Forgiveness for such acts does not come easy.  I wonder what you thought when some of those at Charleston almost immediately spoke about forgiving the man who had done this terrible act.  They stated that "Hate would not win".

My own reaction was to wonder whether they had acted without due thought.  I also wondered what exactly might have been the motivation in speaking words of forgiveness so soon after the event. Did they feel it was the "Christian thing to do"?  Did they hope that by countering hatred with love the man might become ashamed?  Did they think that it was what God expected?

Such declarations of forgiveness have become a common practise particularly among evangelical churches, so much so that it has become a kind of pop theology.  This in turn can cause some people deep hurt.  For example, one priest in the Church of England resigned her position when she found she could not forgive the people who caused the 7/7 disaster in which her daughter died. She felt guilt for her inability to forgive.  Another friend who was sexually abused within a church context and by a person whose help she was seeking was publicly verbally attacked on a Christian radio broadcast because she confessed she could not forgive her abuser.  In such situations Christians and a poorly informed culture added guilt to the hurt already being suffered.

While it is true that God loves unconditionally, the Bible does not provide evidence to suggest that he forgives unconditionally.  Indeed the Bible makes clear that forgiveness is only possible on the grounds of true repentance.  Love makes forgiveness available.  It is as if it is waiting in the wings, just waiting to bestow its blessing.  If that is how God's righteousness is expressed is there not a danger when Christians speak words of unqualified forgiveness?  Where does God's justice come into the situation?

I fully understand that it can be a healthy thing to be able to forgive.  Certainly carrying bitterness and resentment around can be harmful to our personality and hinder spiritual development.  The Bible counsels against such a situation.  It is therefore a good thing to be ready to forgive those who have hurt us.But when the Bible speaks about the importance of forgiving and places it in the same context as our being forgiven by God, surely this means on the same terms.

We also need to be careful regarding what we are forgiving people for, when it comes to third party injury.  If we have suffered the loss of a loved one then we might be able to forgive the perpetrators for the loss and hurt we have felt.  But we cannot forgive the perpetrators for what they have done to their victim.  God alone can do that.  The young man who committed the murders in Charleston will no doubt feel the full weight of the law and due punishment for his crimes.  Furthermore he needs to know that he is living under the wrath of a loving and holy God.  I hope that he will experience sufficient conviction for his sin that forgiveness might be experienced.

It is commendable that Christians in Charleston felt able at that moment to speak words of love and forgiveness. Personally, I think such words would have greater weight after the shock and pain had really sunk in.  However, I applaud their desire.  But we should take care not to be casual when it comes to forgiveness, and hand it out like sweeties.  Holding people to account for what they have done is often the more loving act.

Monica Cook's Funeral

Friends who had come to know Monica at various stages in her life and who could manage the journey gathered at Holy Trinity Parish Church on Friday as we laid her mortal remains at rest.  It was a warm and pleasant summer afternoon as we gathered to honour her memory and to support her family in their loss. After the service their was warm fellowship  as people shared their memories.

The service was recorded both as an audio recording and a video recording.  These are available for people to download.  In order to access these you will need Dropbox, which is a free and useful programme.  If you do not already have Dropbox please let me know as I can gain the benefit of extra storage space if you sign up on my recommendation.  If you do already have Dropbox please email me so that I am aware of your email address and can share the folder with the photos and recordings.

Please note that the provisional date for the Thanksgiving Event is the afternoon of Sunday 13th September.  Further information will be sent out once this is confirmed.

From this week's diary

Sunday 5th July - Yelvertoft Congregational Church
Monday 6th July - School Assembly, Lubenham, Leics.
Tuesday 7th July - HMP Gartree
Friday 10th July - Taking part in a constitutional meeting for the Free Churches Group, London
Saturday 11th July - attending the Induction Service for the Rev Stephen Haward, Market Harborough Congregational Church.

Over the past few weeks Doreen and I have received many messages of fellowship at this time of loss of a special colleague.  These have been very much appreciated.  It has been a demanding time as I have had to correspond with around 350 people.  If I have failed to respond to a card, letter or email, I hope that you will understand.  The many kind and generous comments about Monica and the ministry we have shared has meant a great deal to me.

Thak you,

Barry