Saturday 23 November 2013

Vulnerability

About t en days ago (before all the sad news about Paul Flowers) I wrote down the word "Vulnerable" with a view to using the concept for last weekends news blog.  However, once I started writing it took on a different direction.  I think what had triggered this thought was the way in which in many situations we seem disinclined to acknowledge personal vulnerability, preferring instead to project a more positive image of ourselves and of the churches and organisations we represent.

As someone brought up on the King James Version of the Bible my mind went to James 5:15 which reads "Confess your faults to one another...." The word 'faults' implies a certain weakness, a propensity to get things wrong, or a vulnerability.  However,  the KJV betrays a certain anti-catholic bias perhaps in that the word used in the Greek text is hamartia which is usually translated sin. Indeed in the letter from James the same Greek word appears five other times and on each occasion the KJV translators render it sin. (see 1:15 (twice), 2:9, 4:17, and 5:20).

But perhaps reading these other passages provides an understanding of what James understands sin to be.  Take, for example the passage in chapter 4 where  he states that just failing to do what you know is good, is sin.  Again in chapter 5:20 "erring from the truth" is sin within the life of a Christian.  Maybe, in the light of all that James has to say about practical Christian living there cannot be one among us who can avoid being defined as a sinner!

Is it more healthy to be more open about our human nature and our propensity to mess up and miss opportunities to do the right thing?  I had a personal experience this week regarding the aspect of knowing what is good and failing to do it.  I had been asked by a colleague on the prison chaplaincy team if I would talk with someone who was a Hindu and who had recently lost his father.  The person making the request made clear that it was not important for me to stay and meet with this man as he intended to speak with him anyway.  Time was short and if I said I would meet with him it would take up at least another hour, and I had a pile of work to do. So I said that it was not very convenient at that time.  He said it didn't matter and he would meet with him.  But as I left the room I knew I should have said I would stay.  But the opportunity had passed and could not be recovered (though I tried).  I came home feeling bad about myself.

Acknowledging when we mess up in such a way does require being willing to make ourselves vulnerable. Naturally, we want to be thought of as 'better than that'. So instead of being honest we project the image we would rather people saw, even if it's a lie.  A number of years ago a ministry colleague told me about his experience in attending a ministers fraternal meeting.  Each person had to give a short report about their church and he was amazed to hear such glowing stories.  He felt people were not being entirely honest.  Feeling that there must be someone who was struggling and not a brilliantly successful minister he deliberately spoke about some negative issues when it came to his turn.  To his surprise all who had yet to share their story responded by stating that they were glad that their churches weren't like that!  They just had to keep up the illusion.

The Bible makes clear that putting spin on things is not righteous.  The stories of the Bible, both Old Testament and New, reveal children of God who have feet of clay.  Take King David for example, or Moses getting angry, or Peter who is openly accused of hypocrisy (and then Paul writes to a church and tells them all about it!).  The Bible tells us that if any in leadership in the churches sin they should be publicly rebuked.  But when we are confronted with the weakness and failing of a fellow believer, we should always act in love, and be aware that we too will be judged in the way that we judge others.

In Romans 15:14 Paul commends the Christians in Rome because they were able to admonish one another.  An admonition is not harsh criticism.  Rather it is positive, helpful and supportive corrective advice.  This passage suggests that their maturity enabled them both to admonish and to be admonished.  So obviously there was at least some degree of honesty about weakness and failings. Could it be that our inability to make the spiritual progress we should be making is a lack of honesty about ourselves, both before God and one another?  Perhaps there is more than one way of understanding what is meant by the Sunday lie in! In the light of the Coop Bank debacle and the embarrassment caused to the Methodist Church I wonder whether at sometime in the past Paul Flowers allowed himself to be more concerned about image rather than honesty, which then became a bad habit.

Recent News
This week I came under considerable pressure from the Charity Commission regarding the Christian Mission I have been endeavouring to help.  This meant that several important things (including spending time on my research as planned) had to be sacrificed in order to get several jobs completed.  I had to agree certain deadlines with the Commission and have been able to meet all except those beyond my control.  The Action for Christ aspects are now all up to date.  Part of the tasks has involved preparing some accounts for the original charity, Mission for Christ.  As the Mission bookkeeper and I started working on these various further serious matters have come to light regarding the actions of a former trustee.  Working on these historic matters has been very stressful for Heather, the bookkeeper who has also been unwell.  We are grateful that we can rely on Heather and I ask you to pray for her as we work through these tasks.

On Friday Doreen, my wife, had a nasty fall in our garden, landing badly on her back and probably cracking a few vertebrae.  We spent that afternoon and part of the evening in a local A& having examinations and x-rays.  We return on Monday afternoon when we anticipate her having an MRI scan. She is in significant pain and I have had to take on the role of carer.  So more juggling of priorities.  Please pray that she gets the MRI and that appropriate actions follow.  It does not help that she already has peripheral neuropathy caused by deterioration to the spinal column.  This affects her balance and ability to walk.

The Coming Week
Sunday 24 -  9.00 Gartree Prison and 10.45 Yelvertoft Congregational Church
Monday 25 - 1.00 School Assembly, Lubenham, Leics. Immediately following Doreen has an appointment at Kettering Hospital.
Tuesday 36 - 1.00 to 3.30 Gartree Prison.  Then travelling to East Sussex if Doreen is fit enough to be left.
Wednesday to Friday 27 - 29 Activities in East Sussex related to Mission for Christ.
Sunday  1st December - Yelvertoft.

There is further work on bookkeeping for Mission for Christ required and, if possible, some time must be given to the research.

All this is subject to Doreen's health.  My responsibility as her husband is part of ministry and a trust from God.

Thank you for your prayers and also thanks for those providing financial support for the ministry.  Please excuse me if I fail to acknowledge correspondence and gifts at this time.

Barry



Sunday 17 November 2013

Who planned this journey?

Three weeks have passed since my last Praise & Prayer News.  The first week was accounted for as Doreen and I took a short autumn break.  Since returning I have found myself kept busy so that various routine plans have been disturbed including the writing of this blog/newsletter.

The Break
I am often taken to task for not taking as much holiday as I should.  I also find that planning holidays which Doreen might find enjoyable, especially as her peripheral neuropathy limits what we would like to do, is far from easy. The idea of spending some days in Snowdonia, north Wales came to mind and the possibility of going up Snowdon on the mountain railway appealed, sop off we set.

Through the week before our departure we watched the weather forecast eagerly.  Sometimes there is a period of clear and sunny weather at the end of October, but this year it looked as if high winds and plenty of rain would ruin our plans.  As it turned out, it felt as if what happened each day had been planned by a knowledgeable  tour guide.  We arrived on a Tuesday evening as we could not leave until my regular visit to prison had taken place (we were expecting to give a concert around that time).  The farm B&B we had booked proved splendid (I recommend Farmstay UK to anyone looking for good hospitality). Wednesday looked like being the least bad weather but a phone call to the Snowdonia Mountain Railway informed us there were no places available on trips that day.  Our host urged us to just turn up and ask again, which we did.  There were just two seats available on the late morning train!

We found ourselves joining a coach party that had booked as part of a tour.  We squeezed into the last compartment and found ourselves in excellent company.  The scenery was wonderful, as was the recorded commentary.  Partway we paused at Hebron, (see Genesis 13) where the remains of a small chapel can still be seen.  Obviously it had been built to serve the scattered upland farming community.  Apparently, it was still in periodic use until fairly recently. We journey on but just over half way up the mountain we had to turn back because the wind was too strong.  But it had been a lovely and informative trip and the company insisted on refunding everyone's fares.  Nice trip for free!

While waiting for the train we called in at the 'Electric Mountain', an amazing feat of engineering with a vast cavern carved out inside the mountain to house a hydro-electricity generating station,  Our hope to take the tour on day two was now frustrated as there were no places.  So instead day two was spent visiting the local slate museum.  Some of this is out of doors but a break in the weather made it possible for us to enjoy the full experience.  This included a brilliant talk and demonstration from a man for whom this was his last day at work.  We would have lost out had we come on the third day.

That third day we had booked into a tour inside 'Electric Mountain'.  It poured with rain so being inside was the perfect solution. It felt as if someone was adjusting our schedule perfectly.  Brilliant as the engineering is, this system depend absolutely on a partnership with God's creation in order to keep the lights on at peak times across the country.

Saturday was wet and windy so Doreen suggested a trip to the pictures.  She was keen to see 'Philomena'.  We very rarely go to the pictures but would not have wanted to miss seeing this moving film. Judy Dench at her best and an amazing piece of work by Steve Coogan as writer, co-producer and seriously good actor.  The film demonstrates another aspect of Ireland's unhappy past and how young unmarried women were mistreated by the Catholic Church.  The scenes towards the end deal with the issue of forgiveness and justice perfectly.  Another positive outcome from a day that could so easily have been wasted.

Sunday was to be our final day.  I had asked our host about local churches and she consulted a friend who attended a Welsh-speaking chapel and found that they provided translation to English via headphones.  It was another wet and windy morning and I dropped Doreen off at the doorway while I went in search of a place to park the car.  As She reached the outer door two other people arrived from the opposite direction.  One 'just happened' to be the friend of our host who looked after Doreen perfectly.  The timing was incredible!  Although we were in Caernarfon it felt just like a village church and home from home.  Excellent welcome, good fellowship, engaging ministry, generous love, enjoyable singing (I managed one whole hymn in Welsh and knew it well in English).

We emerged to sunshine and after lunch we spent our final afternoon driving over the mountains.  A casually planned route took us on what is apparently one of the best journeys in the area with breathtaking beauty and the first autumn snow resting on the tops of the mountains.

You may well be bored reading about something so personal as a short holiday in Wales.  I share it because it genuinely felt as if all my plans had been taken and readjusted so that it could not have been better.  It was a microcosm of my life since I handed it over to God.  Of course things go wrong and there are the equivalent of wet and windy days, but we are secure in his care and the plans he has for our lives are those that are best.

Prison
Sadly, the expected concert has never happened but the choir has been given the opportunity to sing at a Celebration of Faith and Hope within the prison community.  We have prepared 'The Holy City' (based on revelation 21) and 'In Christ alone my hope is found'.  The event takes place at the end of this month.

Remembering
A major feature of recent days has been the annual Remembrance Day. The village school had asked if I would take the children in year six to their regular act of remembrance on the Friday morning (8th).  I gladly accepted and offered some extra time.  This resulted in an hour's lesson with the top class, a school assembly and the time at the war memorial with the children.  Lots of positive responses from children and teachers!  I was back in school last Tuesday for a routine visitor assembly on the theme of light.

From the school visit on Friday I set off to Stafford for the cremation followed by a thanksgiving service for a former Office manager in my days in Mission for Christ.  David Woodward had proved a rock during his time with us.  He arrived together with his wife, Barbara and their friend, Beth and the three proved a formidable and precious team.  David's daughter, Ruth is a children's evangelist and had also worked with us.  Ruth asked me if I would like to say a few words at the Thanksgiving Service which I was glad to do, though unprepared.  It had been over 25 years since we had worked together.  The trio had used retirement years as a gateway to service.  Wonderfully, David and Barbara's son, Dr Michael Woodward has just started doing the same working with OMF in Cambodia.  Would that more would use such opportunities.

On our homeward way from  our short break in Wales Doreen and I called in to visit Alfred and Sylvia Lavender who now live near Stoke.  Sylvia has not been well and has spent many weeks in hospital and is currently in a care home where the four of us met up.  I had worked with Alfred for 25 years and we had both married our wives during that time.  Alfred is an extremely talented and under-appreciated evangelist with a real passion for sharing the gospel.  It was good to fellowship, talk and pray together.

Good News in the Countryside in Southwell
On behgalf of the Rural Evangelism Network and on Wednesday 13th November I led sessions for the Diocese of Southwell and Nottingham on rural evangelism. Those attending included some with experience in rural ministry; others were newly appointed. It proved a good group to work with and our resources are on their website.  It was good to meet up with the Revd Jonathan Smithurst and others from his benefice on the borders of Nottinghamshire and Yorkshire which I had served with an Away Day in the past.

Yelvertoft
The ministry in the village moves forward steadily.  Our recent Pudding Festival and the United Remembrance Service have reinforced our image of being here to serve and bless the community in the Lord's name.  In a few weeks time we launch what we hope will be a monthly form of Messy Church. Please pray as the information starts to go around the village.

Mission for Christ/Action for Christ
Pressure from the Charity Commission has meant that the task of recovering the Mission from a disaster caused by illegal actions and mismanagement by a former trustee has had to take priority again.  Mission for Christ is the organisation in which I worked for 25 years with Alfred and many others.  Monica Cook, who still works as a valued colleague, trained and worked in the Mission. Apart from his wrong-doing, the former trustee has proved uncooperative as we have sought to put affairs in order.  This has protracted things but we are slowly getting there.  A formal agreement between the Mission and another Christian charity in Yorkshire is now about to be signed.  He had left this in a terrible mess.  Apart from taking £26,500 from the charity illegally, he claimed enormous expenses and failed to provide evidence to support much of this.  He had managed to get away with this by reducing the number of trustees and by obtaining authority to draw funds direct from the bank electronically.

I came back on board as a trustee in June 2012 and have been working with the Charity Commission, Companies House, the Police and various other authorities since then.  A Mission once worth over £700,000 had been reduced to a few hundreds of pounds and an uncertain future.  Yet, amazingly, the Lord has been supplying sufficient funds to keep the work afloat while we sort out the problems inherited and seek God's guidance regarding the future.  New trustees are waiting to be appointed and the final stages of the rescue plan agreed with the Charity Commission should be completed before the end of this year.

Pondering on the way that the Lord has provided to keep the remnant of this once very active Mission going took my mind to the account of Elijah at Kerith (see 1Kings 17).  The whole land was in crisis because of ungodly leadership.  At a time of famine the Lord took care of his servant.  Kerith was a place of miraculous provision, but it was a provision for a limited time as God had further plans for Elijah. We believe that God still has plans for Mission for Christ.  For the moment in the midst of the sad situation in which I found it, God has been clearly nurturing its life, and I and the current team of trustees are grateful.

God's provision and protection of Elijah during this time of crisis is among the most amazing accounts of God's provision.  Twice each day food was delivered to him.  I am not an expert in Hebrew but read somewhere that the word translated 'ravens' could have been a common term for Arabs.  There is plenty of evidence in scripture for ways in which God sovereignly interacts with other creatures.  But the lesson here perhaps is not so much about that but that God made such consistent provision for his servant: not just a daily provision, but twice daily.  With God, all things are possible.

The Onward Journey
Our hope remains in the God who guides and provides.  We can do no better than to put our lives into his hands to serve him, whether in big or small ways, with all that we have.  I have experienced the truth behind such catch phrases as "Where God guides, he provides" and "What God orders he pays for".  While I know where my journey will end I have no idea what lies ahead (though I still have hopes and dreams).   Your continued prayers are asked for Monica and myself in our own ministry of Sunrise Ministries and Rural Mission Solutions.  Please also pray for all with whom we network and serve, especially the Mission for Christ situation at this time.

Thank you.

Barry